Puppies are undeniably adorable. But is raising a puppy hard? Social media, TV, and movies usually make it look fun and easy. But there’s far more to responsible dog ownership than you might realize. In fact, new research in the journal PLOS ONE showed that one in three families found raising a puppy harder than they had expected. If you’re thinking of bringing a dog into your home, preparation and realistic expectations will help ensure the whole family enjoys their new companion.
The Benefits of Puppy Ownership
To explore the impact of puppy ownership, the researchers surveyed families in the United Kingdom with children eight to 17 years old. Responses were collected from 382 adult caregivers and 216 children. Both parents and children reported deriving happiness from dog ownership. Plus, most of the children felt comforted by their dog and many described their dog as their best friend.
According to Dr. Rowena Packer, Ph.D., PGCert (VetEd), FHEA, senior lecturer in companion animal behavior and welfare science at Royal Veterinary College and one of the members of the research team, the children had found a truly unconditional friend. “We know the politics of the playground and how challenging it is to grow up and have friendships in flux,” she says. “Your dog is just always there for you, always happy when you come through the door. You’ve got that kind of confidant you can share anything with, and you know they won’t tell anybody. You’ve got that constant source of companionship.”
A Puppy’s Impact on Family Dynamics
In terms of family benefits, companionship was key for everybody. Plus, some of the survey respondents found their dogs really brought the family together and allowed them to share activities like walking the dog. But Dr. Packer said there was also evidence of interfamily conflict such as jealousy and parents having to spend more time with the dog than expected.
One interesting result was the burden of care that fell on mothers. Ninety-five percent of the dogs’ primary caregivers were women. Dr. Packer refers to it as maternal load. “Caring for children, whether that is physically or arranging childcare, doctor’s appointments, or any kind of help for children, seems to have quite a mirror here. It’s not to say that there aren’t some men who are pulling their weight out there. But it does look pretty profound that dog care looks like a very female job in society.”
Children Don’t Always Take Responsibility for the Family Dog
Almost half of the study participants reported an area where their child wasn’t as involved with the dog as anticipated. Dr. Packer thinks part of that may have been the novelty of a new puppy wearing off. Plus, over the course of a dog’s life, not only will the puppy change and grow, so will your child. “Your child is going to change an extraordinary amount in your dog’s lifetime, and their enthusiasm, their time commitments, and their priorities are going to shift hugely over more than a decade. So I think lowering expectations, although it sounds quite pessimistic, is key from the outset.”
Although she feels like the fun police, Dr. Packer advises against getting a dog specifically for your child. Raising a puppy is hard, so you are quite likely to end up with a bigger burden on yourself as a parent or caregiver than you might expect. And if there isn’t time available between all the family members to care for the dog, it puts the dog at risk of relinquishment.
Unsafe Dog-Child Interactions
Many of the caregivers in the study were taken aback by how difficult it was to establish safe boundaries between their new puppy and their children. Nipping, biting, and jumping up, behaviors the children reported as negative aspects of dog ownership, were particularly surprising for first-time puppy owners. Children needed to be taught the rules of safe puppy interactions; however, the adults reported their children ignoring or misinterpreting dog body language that indicated the dog was uncomfortable. Even behaviors associated with dog aggression such as growling and snapping didn’t dissuade the children.
The survey looked at 17 interactions that are associated with increased risk of a dog bite. These included pulling on the dog’s tail or ears, kissing or hugging the dog, picking up the dog, and waking a sleeping dog. Over 50 percent of the children were permitted to perform eight of the 17 dangerous interactions, which means many of the children were likely around stressed dogs who could bite.
Dr. Packer feels it is difficult to dispel the idea that our dogs enjoy these types of interactions. We express ourselves in tactile ways, such as hugging, and we project those human feelings onto our dogs. Plus, the media normalizes close physical contact as part of the dog-human bond. But, although dogs are incredibly tolerant of human behavior, when you analyze their responses, you often see signs of stress, like looking away, yawning, or a lowered tail.
However, people tend to be bad at reading dogs. If we could learn to recognize when a dog is happy and comfortable versus tolerating us versus actively uncomfortable, Dr. Packer believes it would change the world for dogs. She recommends caregivers and their children learn together as a family about what a relaxed dog looks like, ideally before they acquire a dog.
The Importance of Preparing for a Puppy
Is raising a puppy hard? Of course. If you’re considering adding a puppy to your life, Dr. Packer advises you go in prepared and with your expectations aligned to reality. And that means everybody in the family, not just the female primary caregiver. Take advantage of online resources, but don’t discount the lived experience. Talk to people who own dogs about the realities of ownership and responsible care, the financial cost of dog ownership, and the caregiver burden.
She also recommends hands-on experience with other people’s dogs such as dog sitting for a friend, particularly in the winter when those walks are more of a chore. Finally, take advantage of dog-based organizations for information and support. For example, if you’re suffering from the puppy blues, you can reach out for peer-to-peer advice and know you’re not alone.
Dr. Packer’s biggest take home message is to always put on the brakes when you’re planning to get a puppy. Think about which breed is suitable, what breeder is best, and even ask yourself if you should really own a dog. She says there’s no rush. “We love dogs. They’re not going anywhere anytime soon. So whether you get one next week versus next year, the big factor should be is this the right thing to do and will we have a happy relationship.”